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The Secrets to Lasting Relationships: Advice You Can Give During Your Counsellor Therapist Career

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It is untrue that half of all marriages end in divorce—in fact, the divorce rate is often closer to 35 or 40% overall (Heller, K., 2016). Despite this misconception, is it true that in order to avoid relationship complications, couples should apply healthy communication techniques and other approaches to their partnership.

A satisfying relationship which benefits both parties is important to the emotional, mental, and physical wellbeing of the participating individuals, and serves as an additional buffer from psychological stress and negative life events (Diemer, M.A., et al., 2004). If you are interested in becoming a counselling therapist and want to learn about how to advise clients on maintaining a healthy, lasting relationship, read on to find out more.

Promoting Healthy Communication During Your Counsellor Therapist Career

Communication is an essential factor in maintaining a good relationship (Positive Psychology Program, 2017). It encourages both people in the relationship to share their emotions, thoughts, and opinions openly and constructively. Effectively communicating often involves active listening and empathy, important concepts which are further explored in therapist college programs.

Whenever there is strife in a relationship and an argument ensues, it is more likely than not a by-product of each individual’s own fear or pain (Goldsmith, B., 2011). Arguments can come from misunderstanding, financial worries, household tasks, work responsibilities, and lifestyle choices (Commerford, J., & Parker, R., 2014).

Communication is important to keeping a relationship honest and healthy

Communication is important to keeping a relationship honest and healthy

Couples who practice good communication are reported to cope more positively to money worries and life events because they are more likely to view these negative events as shared troubles, and provide mutual support to each other when needed (Barrett, H., et al., 2010). In fact, 80% of couples in working relationships said that when they communicated about problems, they had a more favorable view of their relationship (Barrett, H., et al., 2010).

Making and Keeping Commitments Is Vital to Healthy Relationships

A relationship is a practice in positively investing time, energy, and emotion into both yourself and another person. Underlying any healthy relationship is the notion that basic values are being shared (Gunther, R., 2015).

Commitment is not only adhering to these rules, but actively demonstrating personal investment to one another throughout the relationship. This can be expressed concretely, with words, gestures, or expression, or more abstractly, such as with actions, displays of solidarity, or demonstrations of gratitude (Gunther, R., 2015).

Counselling therapists can encourage positive behaviour and demonstrations of gratitude

Counselling therapists can encourage positive behaviour and demonstrations of gratitude

There is a commonly expressed theory that building a relationship is simply a matter of ‘working at it’ (Cohen, D. et al., 2002). While commitment can often be a positive sign in a relationship, some individuals choose to stay in their relationship even if they are unhappy due to a sense of loyalty, sentiment, or obligation (Commerford, J., & Parker, R., 2014). Those in a counsellor therapist career should therefore be able to help their clients make the distinction between a beneficial commitment in a relationship, and one in which both parties seem to be uninterested in continuing.

Are you interested in encouraging and helping others to maintain a healthy relationship?

Contact Rhodes Wellness College to find out more about our therapist courses in Vancouver.

Works Cited

Barrett, H., & Chang, Y.S., & Walker, J., & Wilson, G. (2010). Understanding the need of adults (particularly parents) regarding relationship support. Institute of Health and Society, Family and Parenting Institute. Doi: DCSF-RBX-10-01

Cohen, D., & Franiuk, R., & Pomerantz, E.M. (2002). Implicit theories of relationships: Implications for relationship satisfaction and longevity. Personal Relationships, 9. Doi: 1250-4126/02

Commerford, J., & Parker, R. (2014). Lasting couple relationships: Recent research findings. Australian Institute of Family Studies. Retrieved from: https://aifs.gov.au/cfca/sites/default/files/publication-documents/cfca22.pdf

Diemer, M.A., & Mackey, R.A., & O’Brien, B.A. (2004). Relational factors in understanding satisfaction in the lasting relationships of heterosexual and same sex couples. School of Social Work, Boston College. Retrieved from: https://dlib.bc.edu/islandora/object/bc-ir:100041

Goldsmith, B., PhD. (2011 11 July). 10 truths to keep your relationship healthy. Psychology Today. Retrieved from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/emotional-fitness/201107/10-truths-keep-your-relationship-healthy

Gunther, R., PhD. (2015 November 13). 14 secrets to a great relationship. Psychology Today. Retrieved from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/rediscovering-love/201511/14-secrets-great-relationship

Heller, K., PhD. (2016 17 July). The myth of the high rate of divorce. Psych Central. Retrieved from: https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-myth-of-the-high-rate-of-divorce/

Positive Psychology Program. (2017). Romantic relationships: Enhancing your capacity for connection. Retrieved from: https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/relationship-therapy/

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